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I'm really seriously irritated and pissed off by people who don't reply people's messages. They're like so damn rude. I know I know, you people would tell me that he/she doesn't reply me because he/she doesn't like me and finds me annoying blah blah blah. I really don't think disliking a person gives you a valid reason to ignore his or her messages. Unless he or she keeps spamming you with irritating messages, YOU MUST REPLY. This is like a basic manner! People who don't even have this basic manner and just plain rude. And to you out there, yes you who ignored my messages, I'm never gonna message you ever again! Grr. You know who you are. You've been doing that so much I can't stand it anymore. Who do you think you are man.

Meanwhile, I'm still waiting for my good news from Mr. Lau or the MOE people in charge of the GCE music 'O' level course. I still can't believe I was posted to DUNMAN HIGH. It's so far away cos it's like moving next year. They're 'trying to rearrange', wonder how it will end up like. But chances are low that I'll get transferred to ACS, the nearest school which is more convenient for me and many others. The MOE lady I spoke to seemed to expecting our principal to do something for us, like arrange a bus to take us there specially, rather than make us take public transport there ourselves. That's kinda too demanding leh, I don't think Mr Foo or Mr Lam, or any of the VPs would do that for us.

If Dunman was just far away, I wouldn't mind going there for music lessons. The thing is, I won't be able to reach there on time for lessons! In fact, no one in Nan Hua can. Unless we like, take a cab there? Which is really expensive and I'm not that rich okay.

Washed the toilet at home today. For free! My mum doesn't believe in paying me to do house chores, unlike many mothers. She thinks it's training me to have the basic lifeskills so that I can survive alone, independently. She teaches me cooking, washing, cleaning, packing, ironing, drying, organisation and blah blah blah. Zhongjia used to get $6 from her mum everytime she washed the toilet. She got money for ironing clothes as well. Unfair :(

Talking about Zhongjia, I really miss her. She migrated to Wellington like more than 2 years ago and I haven't really seen or talked to her since then. We were quite close, but we had a major tiff in primary 6, I must admit. It involved a lot of shouting, pushing, banging of tables and of course, hating. It's the most major fight of my life with any friend, and I hope it stays that way because I don't wanna fight with anyone anymore. We made up just a while before she left us and apologised to each other. I never should have fought with her, I missed a lot of time which I could spend with her as good friends instead of enemies. Gosh, you only realise how stupid or childish you were when you grow up. I think I have matured a lot! (Being thickskinned)

I miss times with Natalie too, times spent together after graduating from primary school have been really short. We were best friends for so many years, even though I got angry with her in sec one, over a really petty matter. Sorry Nat! We've been through a lot and I hope our friendship lasts till we're old and wrinkled.

I was an idiot in primary school. An idiot who went around offending people and becoming more and more unpopular, an idiot who always badmouthed people behind their backs. I hated life in primary school, and I still don't like it now. It isn't a happy memory for me, it's like a haunting instead. I never want to relive it again, graduating from De La Salle was a relief.

I worry constantly about people harbouring hatred towards me. I haven't made any enemies secondary school, but I wonder if that's just what it appears like. When we were all in primary school, everyone was younger and mostly showed our emotions a lot, never hiding them. Like, if we didn't like a particular person, we showed it. But in secondary school, we've all grown older and more matured. We don't like to offend people and mostly hide our true thoughts, emotions and feelings. The older we get.. It's like the more cunning we get? Sigh.

I don't mind not being popular. I just don't want people to hate or look down on me, like how it was in primary school. But I'm always having this feeling that people dislike me. I happen to know that some people think I don't deserve what I have right now.

Lots of people tell others: "If you don't like me, then just tell me. Don't badmouth me behind my back. I accept criticism, say it in my face."

But I'm not so sure I want that. Maybe I'd prefer people to talk bad about me behind my back. I'm not so sure if I can accept the fact that I am unpopular and hated by all if it is true and said in my face. Maybe it would be better if I were oblivious to all these unpleasant facts.